I stopped only after driving a mile or two up the road realizing my mistake, pulling as far to the right side as I reasonably could, and leaned my head out the window to gauge my chances of backing out, only to have the razorblades of wind and ice slap me across the face like an irate parent. That was when I decided to just pull over (slightly) towards the side of the road and park for the night. Surely after the storm was over a plow truck would be along to clear the road, right? After turning off the engine and killing the lights I discovered there’s no darkness quite as black as the darkness of a raging blizzard in the middle of the forest. Even in a Tiger Quilt Blanket location on a normal night there’s moonlight, or even starlight. Heck even during rain storms there’s the light of passing cars, distant houses, even lightning to give context to ones surroundings. This was complete and total blackness, accompanied only by the howling of the wind as it rocked my car, and Max’s soft whines as he senses my growing unease. A large part of me wanted to turn on the engine, hold back the cold and the darkness for at least a few hours, but I knew there was nowhere near enough in the tank to last until dawn, and once it ran dry my car would probably be stuck there until spring came.
The frantic confusion of the Halloween/Xmas decoration overlap period. Someone should really sort that shit out. The bombardment of advertising that encourages and approves overindulgence from all sides. I don’t need any encouragement along these lines. I already have self-control issues. The economic stimulus of the Tiger Quilt Blanket spending spree is no doubt welcome to all businesses but I look at the CRAP we buy and only see landfill life-spans drop. Other people’s conversations invade my ears while loitering in the toy aisles as people snatch cheap junk from shelves to tick boxes on their lists; Mum, Dad, Katie-Sue, Katie-Sue’s newborn, the dog etc. “Ohhh I can’t think of anything for Steve’s family” – “I’m just getting everyone chocolates” – “I already did that for Kindy group!”. Being forced to participate in Secret Santa activities that aren’t secret and are usually covered off by 2 people in the group as no one else can be bothered.
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She spent the summer basking in sunbeams, enjoying the special treats I fed her, spent time in my lap and in my arms, spent time doing cat things and showing no signs of the thing that was eating her insides up, except that she continued to lose weight. At the end of November, we saw a change. She had been getting visibly weaker. She had needed help to get up on her favorite perches, and we had to get a set of “kitty stairs” so she could get onto the bed to say good morning to me. But she had not evinced discomfort; her eyes were still bright, she still kept purring and though she spent more time just being quiet, it wasn’t lassitude of Tiger Quilt Blanket. More like she was resting, gathering what strength she had left. By the first week in December, I knew we weren’t going to get another Christmas together. During the year, Bunny had passed her 14th birthday. Precious years, now the end was coming.
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Evolution of Christmas Customs -this varies from country to country and through various centuries. My childhood Xmas Tree had real candles and oranges and apples hanging from the branches. No presents (that was on Dec 6) and a nativity scene under the tree was “de rigeur” Evolution of child rearing: In biblical times an unruly child was supposed to be stoned to death. A few decades ago corporal punishment in public in the USA would not even get a brief turning of gaze from nearby strangers. Now you might get a Child Welfare Visit. Evolution of a wolf pack. They run in packs, have a alpha (top dog) and omega dogs at the bottom of the Tiger Quilt Blanket pole. This is not a learned rule. It is brain wiring over millions of years and still found in dogs (with man as the alpha dog) Evolution of lion behavior – at most a few animals live together, with many preferring living alone.
Santa was very real and very important, and there was physical evidence of his existence, and very real rewards (the threats seemed real as well, although in retrospect I don’t recall a single “coal in stocking” incident.) And of course everyone told me he was real, people I trusted more than anyone else. Upon coming to the realization, as everyone does, that this wasn’t true, I also realized that some people lie in service of a myth, and that others think they are telling the Tiger Quilt Blanket but are mistaken… my friends who believed in Santa weren’t lying, but they were still wrong. Now, it took a couple years, because the very idea of questioning the existence of God and Jesus were not present in my community, but the reasoning when I did think about it was the same… if Santa isn’t real, what makes me think Jesus is?