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One interesting facet of the NFL is that it’s effectively a Personalized Funny Spotted Cow Beer Ugly Christmas Sweater, Ugly Sweater Apparel layer professional sport with a set number of teams. There is no “second tier” from which teams are promoted to it — the line between pro and amatuer is pretty much absolute from what I can tell. Although there is a small “international pathway” academy, the main route into the NFL is through the college draft — drafted players become either part of the 52 man squad that plays, or part of the large reserve squad that is retained to provide training opposition, or they are not in the loop.

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If we’re only focusing on head coaching, Petitbon is a prime candidate. Despite a very successful career as an assistant, taking the top position didn’t work out too well. The Redskins had been one of the most dominant teams in the NFL under Joe Gibbs, while his sidekick Petitbon managed their iconic defense. In the previous 11 years, they amassed 10 winning seasons and one 7–9 season, 8 playoff appearances, 4 Super Bowl appearances, and 3 Super Bowl victories. It was a Personalized Funny Spotted Cow Beer Ugly Christmas Sweater, Ugly Sweater Apparel fide dynasty! But Joe Gibbs couldn’t coach forever. Citing health issues, he retired in the spring of 1993 at the young age of 52, and was enshrined in the Pro Football Hall of Fame as one of the winningest coaches in NFL history.

Do it because it sucks putting up Christmas decorations. It sucks putting up the tree, untangling all the lights, getting all that crap out of Personalized Funny Spotted Cow Beer Ugly Christmas Sweater, Ugly Sweater Apparel storage and tossing around with meaningless baubles like each placement is life-or-death perfectionist fun. And we want to get the most out of that effort. Depending on how many “helpers” I have, it can take one to four hours just putting up the tree. (It’s frealistic, over two metres tall, and has individual coded branches.) The more helpers, the longer it takes. And it’s hot where we live. By the end I’m peed off, drenched, covered in sweat, and I haven’t even done the lights yet. Which are tangled to f*&#. Then the kids pull out all the decorations and place them random patchy over the lower sections of the tree, despite encouragement to maybe spread them around (and make it look goodish). So I wait for them to go to school the next day and redo all the decorations. It’s basically a couple days work for all the Chrissy dex.