Hey this is Rocket Science shirt

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In the post OP states that the other SIL has asked said SIL to bring some extra food for her kids and has said no to third servings and the said SIL got pissed. It seems to me she just doesn’t want to be the one speanding the extra $20 per meal.. but put it on everyone else in the family and then gets mad when people day no.Counterpoint – you seem to be mostly focusing specifically on price. We aren’t certain exactly what OP’s situation is in terms of cost of living, typical food prices, their own financial situation, etc. Trying to remove the assumptions you’re making that are central to your judgement, the fact that the OP’s husband agrees and her SIL also struggles to prepare enough food as well means it’s far more likely this isn’t just some inconsequential amount of extra money that is being spent here.I am saying hosting Hey this is Rocket Science shirt  immediate family costs MORE THAN $20. When she doesn’t host someone else hosts spending more than $20 to host her and her kids.ESH is fair too because the sister in-law needs to make sure her kids are less entitled/more mannerly, and make sure everyone eats first.

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Them feeling entitled to and taking extra food in that manner is just greediness and is absolutely an AH thing to do, and if you want to say Hey this is Rocket Science shirt  are exempt from being AHs (as some on this sub seem to) then the parents are the AHs for not teaching them manners.I agree with this. My mom’s sister has four kids, all of which eat a ton of food AND are similarly entitled about it – possibly more, but lacking the details I won’t make that judgment. My mom is hesitant to visit my grandmom while her sister is there, not because she doesn’t love my aunt (my mom does so much for her), but because my aunt and grandmom spend so much time catering to them eating that it’s not even quality time anymore. So if it’s refusing once or twice a year, maybe it’s time to revisit the conversation about etiquette, but if it’s super often I understand OP’s perspectiveSo I’d be willing to concede that if you think OP is being an AH here then at the very least it’s ESH, but the SIL and her kids suck way more – I would 100% understand why someone wouldn’t want to cook a “really good dinner” for greedy and entitled people that deemed it was owed to them.

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