I hope you read all these comments. I practiced neurology, psychiatry for 14 years and Agent Zero Tee Shirt. Not shouting, just making sure you see this. He needed you to be the Mommy, to comfort him and just be there. And you did it!! Children at times cannot grasp adult concepts so it is up to us to protect them. From what I just read, you did a fantastic job..grieve him yes..suffer guilt..
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A few years ago, one of my best friends who was like Agent Zero Tee Shirt. It was my honor to have been by his side for the last two weeks of his life. He knew he was dying. I knew he was dying. But we could never talk about it, because he wanted everyone else to believe he was going to make it. Day after day, we would sit there and lie to each other about what we were gonna do after he was going to get better. He was gonna buy a ’99 Mustang and get it track ready. We would go to the desert and camp out. We would work together and get my Camaro ready for drag racing. On his last day, he could no longer talk, no longer see. But he could still hear my voice.